I did end up finding a doula to work with. Kate, who manages the Portland Volunteer Doula Program here, became my doula. I cannot imagine going through my birth without her there. My partner would have been panicked and scared and I would have been defensive and felt isolated. It felt good to have someone in our corner. Some one who has seen hundreds of births and gone through two of her own. She really did go above and beyond for us. She cashed in a favor and asked one of her friends to process my placenta for me so I would run less of a risk of having postpartum depression. The friend was Maria at Agape Doula Services. I’m so grateful for Kate and I’m so grateful for Maria who encapsulated my placenta and had it ready less than three days after I gave birth.
I feel like we found a friend, a kindred spirit and not just someone to advocate for us during a birth. I’m genuinely sad to be moving far away from here. [Oh, yeah, I’m moving, again. This time we are going back east. Back to my childhood home. I’ll tell all about that in another post.] I can imagine her at my Holiday parties and I really hope one day, if I ever have another kid, I can have her at my birth again, but this time, I’ll be able to pay her.
The link here is Kate’s take on my birth. I cry when I read it still. So does J. I’m not sure why we cry but we do. I’m pretty sure it just breaks my heart a little. And then I go hug Felix and I’m not broken hearted anymore.